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I’m Andy

These are my thoughts.

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Knot and Bundle

The human is an animal with many faces and many armsand the faces and the arms argue and fight The human animal is a disunitya tensely held knot of contradicting frustrationsall of which are interwoven intosomething taut The human animal is a bundle of many habitsthat walks on two legs

Fragments

Figure out what hubris smells like; then stay away. Anxiety: Accept the thought, or stalk it with Socratic thoroughness. Don’t bleed in public. Don’t walk like a lamb. The majority of experience is shaped by expectation. And there is not experience without expectation. The body is expectation incarnate. (it expects that fire burns and food…

The Face of Their God

I sat by four girls in a cafe. They sat on high stools around a small table each with an open Bible. They made the sign of the cross. I tried to read but could only hear them pray. I saw their god. An old man. Wise. Kind. But not benevolent. Fatherly in appearance not…

Telos

You beautiful fucking idiot.You have no purpose. Purpose is for machines. You charming idiot.You have will. Desire.The force that movesMachines by grantingpurpose.

Find Yourself a Girl

Find a girl smart enough to realize that diamonds are bullshit. And more power to her if she can find a better gem, or a better metaphor.

Haunting at 503 Cherry St.

I am haunted by the ghost of an Ivy League graduate, dead by suicide in his prime twenties for not being enough. He floats about as a hungry ghost. He makes fun of my IQ. And he shakes his head in disgust when I make frivolous expenses in a gross attempt to be classy. He’s…

All Along the Bell Curve

God distributed talent along the bell curve. May he be kind to the left tail. Because, we are not. […] Talent and ability is distributed randomly. What credit can I take? What blame can I give?

Words, Words, Words

Most thinking isn’t done with words. Decisions and justifications are expressed as words. And there’s a good argument that words can help us sort through good and bad judgement. But impressions, knowledge, and wisdom are all much stranger than language. Language is the fruit of an organic process; the apple hardly resembles the tree.

A Stranger in a Strange Land

I don’t know when I made it into College Station, Texas. But I know that the drive was fourteen hours, and I walked into Whataburger at 2:27am. I texted a friend saying this is a different country because there were half a dozen rowdy, not-quite-21-year-old boys and girls who all piled out of an oversized,…

Material Reflection

Some years ago, I bought out my lease and moved with little time to spare. I sold what I could. I piled everything into a small room in a new house. There was no room to walk. It was night and the floor was a dark ocean. I laid on my bare mattress, floating. ……

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Andy B.